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April 23rd, 2011:

La Croce – The Cross

Good Friday. God suffers in our flesh, but also in our own weak spirit, fearing rejection, abandonment by friends and the Father. Fearing the cross, rather than for the physical pain, for the moral contempt.
When the cross is not present in our lives, maybe we delude ourselves that when we will carry it – because a certain dimension of cross will sooner or later enter in the life of all – we will be sure of our choice, we will carry it, maybe crying, but with our dignity intact, the inner beliefs unshaken. We will climb the mountain looking upwards, towards the infinite
Then the time comes. The cross is even smaller than you would expect, but you’re on the valley floor, you do not see where you’re going, you’ve lost your way. How far away is the goal? You have no idea, and physical exhaustion keeps you from thinking. You feel like, and it seems possible, to drop everything and go away. But you’re trapped in an insane enterprise. Then, somehow, who knows where the strength comes from, you can get up and be on your way again. And the doubts come back stronger then ever, take over your mind and your will: Is this really the right direction? But do I really have to carry all this weight? Why they do not crucify me here and now, saving me all this suffering?
If, deep down you would not believe in communion with Him who suffered on the cross, everything would seem useless and wasted. Instead you know that everything in Him will become Light, Fullness, Happiness.

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